It’s hard to decide which blog will be THE first official blog post. I had a list of ideas that might make more sense chronologically or to develop a theme gradually. But this one kept jumping out at me so here goes!
I wish there was a magic wand that can make bullying and name calling disappear. But then again, I really don’t – because it creates such an opportunity to remind your children about recognizing and valuing their own worth. A few months ago, my daughter came home from school and was upset because one of her classmates said something not nice about her. I asked her if she thought that the comment that was made was true. When she said, “No”, I told her that I agree with her and that we both know that it is not true. Then I had her say out loud, “I know in my heart, that’s not true!” To hammer the idea further home and have some fun, we played a couple of “What Ifs” scenarios. We started off small with “What if someone says you are wearing a pink shirt right now?” (She was wearing a blue dress that day!). She giggled while she said she wasn’t and I reminded her to say, “I know in my heart that’s not true!” What if they say you have purple curly hair? More giggles but she was catching on and played along. “I know in my heart that’s not true!”
Then I took it up a level. “What if someone says that you are not a kind person?” I asked her how she would respond then. You know what’s next…. “I know in my heart that’s not true!” “What if they say that you are not a hard worker?” We did a few more examples but you get the idea! I explained to her that when scenarios like this happen, she can say them out loud or quietly in her head but it MUST be said!!
Fast forward a few weeks, and I had a challenging mom night. You know… the ones where bath time and bedtime seem to take quadruple the amount of time that it normally takes. I started beating myself up internally. All those yucky thoughts that we say to ourselves were flowing – “I’m not a great mom, I’m so overwhelmed, I don’t have it all together, etc.” After my girls were FINALLY asleep (for real) that night, I went in my bedroom, took a deep breath and reminded myself that “I know in my heart, that’s not true!” ❤
Moms, we got this!
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What a meaningful and inspirational lesson for all! I am sure your daughter left that conversation not only feeling better about herself after her tough day at school, but also feeling empowered and confident in how to emotionally confront hurtful words in the future.
I am so glad you were able to use the same message to quiet your own internal “bullies.” It’s interesting how as grown ups, so many of the unkind words we hear on a regular basis are the ones we tell ourselves. We can all use to adopt that mindset and give ourselves a bit more grace, understanding, and kindness.
Thank you for sharing! I can’t wait to see what’s next!
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